Remember the days you wished for what you have today? When I look back at my dating history, I cringe. Yes, I cringe. I cringe at the types of guys I dated but most importantly, I cringe at my own behaviour. I carried with me this scary need for control and validation, I was also very codependent. When I look…View Post
Three years sober. Six years ago if you told me that I’d be writing those three words together, I never would have believed you. I’m 32 now and I’m confident that if I never chose to get sober, I wouldn’t live past my 35th birthday. Sobriety saved my life. Sobriety gave my purpose and a new found love for living.…View Post
I’ve had an interesting 14 months in sobriety. When I think back to 12 months ago and how difficult the first 6 months were, I give myself a big pat on the back for sticking through with the program. Addiction recovery wasn’t an easy thing for me to combat, I was constantly bombarded with my demons and poison each time I stepped out of my flat. There were days I truly thought I’d never get through.
Each year on my birthday I’d blow out my candles and wish for love. The universe has a funny way of making wishes come true because seven months later I entered alcohol addiction recovery and started to fall in the deepest and greatest love of all, the love with my own self. You see, prior to sobriety I was drinking daily. I didn’t know how to sit at a table and simply drink a glass of orange juice, it always had to have something in it like vodka, make it a double too. Back then I was an expensive date, now I’m a very cheap one.
“I miss partying, the drugs, the drinking. I miss it all.” I said. So much so, I’ve been tempted to get a script for adderall just to be able to focus on everything else except this grief, the death of my old self. But that only defeats the purpose of this new journey.